What a terrible state to be in- your mind's all over the place, yet nowhere. There's not been any one thing that my starved grey cells could feast upon, and for so damn long! What is more astounding is that it has never been this bad before. For modest minds like mine, tolerating mediocre levels of intellectual capacity isn't as much of a problem. Its the total absence of any need for brain-usage whatsoever that is driving me to insanity.
It seems like forever since the last time I remember being engrossed in academic curriculum to barely last a concentration span longer than the shortest song on my play-list. Music soothes my head. Doesn't make me use it much; unless its one of those times when I need to dissect details to be able to reproduce it on stage. I work with limited resources when it comes to music- those acquired over three years from observing those innumerable sources of inspiration. Everything else I've ever indulged in, has only been a momentary vent to the occasional bustling of creative energy inside me.
People interest me the most. Undoubtedly. I've amazed myself very often with my ability to have the most intellectually-stunted conversations. I have an enviable knack of generating unthinkable means to prolong insensible discussions. Doing that consistently over a dangerously long period of time has probably taken its toll. Quality is definitely the bigger Q. So big, that despite having 555 friends on a virtual platform and possibly 500 more in reality, I still yearn for meaningful, engaging conversation. I'm meant for bigger things and bigger people, or I'm too small to realise the beauty of the little things that people share.
It boils down to me then. Now that's something to feed on.
